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Writer's pictureThree Little Birds

Meet our new Sibling Bereavement Advocate, Jenaiyah!





Jenaiyah was just 13 years old when she lost her brother Josiah, who was born sleeping in July of 2018. The loss of a sibling at any age is tragic, but to witness your parents lose a baby during adolescence is especially challenging.


After spending time with her brother and encouraging her family to include her in bonding and memory making, they returned home without resources on how to cope with their loss individually or as a family. The complexities of these losses for adults are overwhelming, however, what Jenaiyah found was that, no one was thinking about the impact of grief on a teenagers and the impact it has on their developing mind and their physical and emotional health. Additionally, many bereaved siblings assume a responsibility in helping their parents navigate a new normal, while also managing other siblings and household responsibilities.


Jenaiyah reached out to Three Little Birds to discuss her grief and offer a program of support for other kids like her, to know that they are not alone, they can continue to honor and love their sibling throughout the year and that it is ok to reach out for support when their family experiences the loss of a baby.


LEARN MORE ABOUT JENAIYAH AND JOSIAH!

Tell us more about your experience.

"I know for me when Josiah was born, I went through a tornado of emotions given the fact that I was technically a big sister which was something I wanted more than anything in the world! But, I knew our time together wasn’t going to last long and that hurt me at the time. Being 13 years old and dealing with all these emotions on top of whatever hormones are raging through my body at that age took a toll on me and my mental state." Jenaiyah continues, "There needs to be better bedside bereavement resources for siblings but definitely older siblings. They understand way death and loss more than younger children and need counseling and help to get through this difficult time in their life." 


What have you learned in your journey?

"Nine times out of ten, you might not even know the child/teen is grieving. Same as the parents...they can have good days and bad days, and that impacts the child. I know for me, I could be having a great day and something would remind me of my brother and my day would be completely ruined. Grief is a spectrum. There is no right or wrong way to grieve but how you address it is the most important. It is important to not compare how you feel and rely on the people around you for help. Often, I wouldn’t tell things to my parents because I didn’t want to overwhelm them since they were already dealing with so much. I realized later on what helped my mom through her grief was me remembering that she still had another child that needed her (now I know that doesn't make me selfish or inconsiderate and I wish I would’ve expressed certain things to them when it was happening)."


Why is sibling bereavement support so important?

"During that time in my life I felt like a zombie and I was alone. One of the most common grief symptoms you see for bereaved siblings are being adrift and lonely according to the National Child Traumatic Stress Network. It is my goal as a Three Little Birds Bereaved Sibling Advocate is ensure sure no sibling goes through this process alone and has a shoulder to lean/cry on."


Tell us about your legacy project, JoJo's Rockets!

JoJo’s Rockets is in honor of Josiah Keishawn Lewis, my baby brother, as a safe space for bereaved siblings to support each other through a similar circumstances. Many times when families are dealing with pregnancy loss, the siblings get overlooked because the care team/providers are focused on the parents as the patient. There are very little resources provided to families on how to support children of all ages, so they grieve in silence. The goal of this legacy projects is for no sibling to be left behind or feel left out. "Ohana" means family, family means no one gets left behind or forgotten.


JoJo’s Rocket will work towards developing resources and programs/events for parents and their living children experiencing the loss of a sibling with support books and in-person events or activities for the child to organically connect with others who are grieving to grieve on their own or with support, if they would like.  


Tell us more about yourself!

I graduated high school in 2022 and am currently studying Business Administration with a concentration on small business and entrepreneurship at Bowie State University. I founded my own skin care business called Scrubbie Scoops Ice Cream aimed at redefining being cool and overcoming bullying for young people and I will be competing in the National American New Jersey Pageant this year! I am most excited to find an avenue that allows me to channel my grief and support others...it helps to keep JoJo's memory alive and allows me to be the big sister I always wanted to be.


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