"If our love was enough to save you, you would have lived forever."
Ah….Love. The culprit that got us in here in the first place! Even if a little bit of science was involved, we all know the main ingredient in the creation of your baby was pure sacred parental love. <3 We're going to make things a bit easier on you and just be honest. Grief is a motherf*%$#@$. There we said it. And that is because grief, for as complicated and overwhelming as it is, simply is the physical absence of love. We know it is more complicated than that. But love…love is what created the little heartbeat that began inside you and changed your world forever. Now that it isn’t there, and is so often violently ripped from us, there is a hole in our mind, body and soul where that little love used to be. Not being able to nurture it the only way we know how, with our bodies, our hearts our actions…its absolutely devastating; hence, why we are here. We are here to seek understanding and self love and compassion. So anytime this gets hard or overwhelming, We want you to go back to that love. The moment, the exact moment, you found out they existed. They were REAL. They are still REAL. How your heart swelled into your throat (with a million emotions) and you knew your life was forever changed. That beautiful natural unbridled love. Whether you are a first-time parent or have other children at home, regardless of when you experienced your loss, you are forever connected to your child. That baby was a part of you and will continue to be a part of you for the rest of your life!
This month, we are focusing our support group discussions and events around the theme of love. Some topics we will be discussing include:
Understanding grief vs. love: You might be quite surprised to learn…they’re the same thing. When people think of love they often think of hearts, romance, and warm-fuzzies, but love is far more complicated. Love can be positive and amazing, yes, but it can also cause the worst kind of pain. Grief is love realizing, if it wants to thrive, it has to be creative and find new ways to connect and be fulfilled. Grief is love’s unwillingness to give up. It’s stretching bonds and redefining limits in order to create a space where you can love someone in their eternal absence. Three Little Birds offers families the space to explore your grief and love and find ways to heal.
Learning to love yourself again after loss: Whether you are days, weeks, months, years or decades since your loss, we know, it is still a daily fixture in your life. The love of parent and child does not end in death. Caring for yourself while in deep grief can seem overwhelming and impossible. Many parents carry the guilt of the coulda’s, woulda’s and shoulda’s that ultimately, would not have changed the outcome. How do we carry forward when we are stuck in our grief?
Establishing a date of remembrance for your baby: When is the appropriate time to honor a baby who has passed away? ANYTIME YOU WANT! Our nest supports families through loss by knowing there isn’t just one date we remember our children…it’s a daily thing! If our children had lived, we would celebrate them several times a year – their birthday, their achievements and other special kid-centric holidays like Halloween or other religious or non-secular holidays.
NEW! - #Shatterthestigma series – Three Little Birds is launching our #shatterthestigma series on our social media channels to allow the certified Mama Birds in the nest a space to share their thoughts and experiences with others so they don’t feel alone and we can begin to find appropriate ways as a community to support the one in four families experiencing pregnancy and infant loss.
Looking for your community? Join the nest! - Want to more information on how Three Little Birds can help? Click here for more information and a link to join our nest. It is free! Residency restrictions apply.